Bill Hicks was een bijzonder grappig man. Begin deze week een paar stukken uit een DVD van hem gezien en ongelooflijk gelachen. Ter uwer entertainment: een paar citaten. Zo valt er toch nog iets te lachen op Kerygma.
I’m so sick of arming the world, then sending troops over to destroy the fucking arms, you know what I mean? We keep arming these little countries, then we go and blow the shit out of them. We’re like the bullies of the world, y’know. We’re like Jack Palance in the movie Shane, throwing the pistol at the sheepherder’s feet.
“Pick it up.”
“I don’t wanna pick it up, Mister, you’ll shoot me.”
“Pick up the gun.”
“Mister, I don’t want no trouble. I just came downtown here to get some hard rock candy for my kids, some gingham for my wife. I don’t even know what gingham is, but she goes through about ten rolls a week of that stuff. I ain’t looking for no trouble, Mister.”
“Pick up the gun.”
(He picks it up. Three shots ring out.)
“You all saw him – he had a gun.”
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Ever noticed that people who believe in Creationism look really unevolved?
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A lot of Christians wear crosses around their necks. Do you think when Jesus comes back he ever wants to see a fuckin’ cross? It’s kind of like going up to Jackie Onassis with a rifle pendant on.
(…)
When Jesus comes back to earth the last thing he wants to see is a cross.